Back in your youth, dear readers, did you ever play The Secret Island of Dr. Quandary? Although Google triggered my memory of the name, the actual PC game’s imagery stuck in my brain like a traumatic clown birthday party. Those dolls were freaky and the island’s doctor was some weird old guy who enjoyed luring small children with magic tricks and hiding in shrubbery … erm.

Anyway, the new Grimm Fairy Tales: Pinocchio Collected Edition stirred up those horrible feelings, and after several hours spent crying dramatically in a corner, I managed to compose myself long enough to review the merciless graphic novel—using its pages for tissues.

Okay, not really, but if you don’t like puppets, keep your distance from this one. Otherwise, you can read the review at OneMetal. Preview below:

With our recent Silent Hill anniversary feature, you’d think we had enough doom and gloom around the OneMetal scene. Logically, yes—we’re still trying to overcome our quivering dependence on the family pack of night lights we just bought (or was that just me?), but Zenescope’s collected edition of Grimm Fairy Tales: Pinocchio landed on our doorstep unexpectedly. I’ll give you a head start on running now. And you thought the Saw movie puppet was bad.

From the innovative minds and hands of David Seidman, Ralph Tedesco, and Dave Hoover crawls a gnarled twist on the well-known Pinocchio marionette story. In common Zenescope fashion, the comic parallels the lives of Mark and his son, Jacob, with the lonely artisan Gepetto and his enchanted craft, Pinocchio. Of course, amass every warm and fuzzy charm of your favorite Pinocchio myth and kiss them goodbye, because Seidman and Tedesco literally carve their re-visioning from a dark and evil wood. Between the devilish conscience of a small cricket whispering menacing notions in Pinocchio’s ear to the circus handlers and real boys who fan the flames of kindled hatred, with each step the anthropomorphic puppet develops a heartless taste for blood. His quest to find the secret of becoming a real boy leads Pinocchio down a startling path wrought with dangerous lies.